round 6 + surgery date

Round 6 was a doozy. Each round has been different, and each has been difficult for it's own reasons. This time around my husband was recovering from being sick and 3 out of our 4 children were sick with fever and cold like symptoms. I took my oldest in to the doctor and we ruled out the flu or strep - it was just a nasty bug. I think my body was fighting off the virus because on Wednesday and Thursday - I hit a fantastically awful wall. I was just so weak - it wasn't the fatigue from round 5 but just pure weakness. I would lay in bed for hours, unable to keep my eyes open. Watching tv or texting on my phone was too exhausting, all I could do was lie there and let my mind wander. I didn't sleep - I just couldn't open my eyes. Matt had to stay home from work on Thursday - there was just no way I could take care of anyone other than myself. I had a low grade fever, body aches and exhaustion. My poor Mom had caught the bug from when she watched my youngest all day on chemo infusion day so she couldn't help and I didn't dare expose anyone else. It was pretty rough. I spent a lot of time praying. I felt like a cancer patient you see on tv - the ones in the hospital beds. I didn't like it.

I am much better today. I know this is primarily because my angel parents took my kids all weekend to give Matt and I a chance to get better and relax. I wish we could have spent Valentine's day with a healthy me but we tried to make the best of it. Matt swears cancer didn't ruin Valentine's day but I'm pretty sure it did. Which is fine, he hates the day anyway, haha! You wouldn't know it from the sweet post he wrote for the kids but it's true.

But guess what? I am on my LAST round!!! How awesome is that?!?! The side effects from the infusion are wearing off and I have to take pills for one more week but then I am officially DONE with chemotherapy. Hopefully for the rest of my life. Or until I'm 80. Cancer can come back when I'm 80 and I will be ok with that. I will embrace it with open arms and let it take me home but anytime before then and I'm just not going to be very happy. I get kind of giddy every time I think about being done with all of this. I have big plans for when I'm healthy again and I can't wait for the next chapter of my life. The survivor chapter. The conqueror chapter. It's gonna be amazing.

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I met with my surgeon on Tuesday. Here is the plan - I will have a cat-scan on Monday, March 2nd. Please pray for me that the scan comes back clean. It's a big day - it will determine if I am officially cancer free or not. I will meet with my oncologist on Tuesday the 3rd to review the results from the scan. If all is well (which I am praying it should be) I will have ileostomy reversal surgery on Thursday March 5th. I AM SO EXCITED!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! MARCH 5TH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! The final step in this whole ordeal. I will be put back together again and this awful, disgusting, annoying bag will be off my body! I CAN'T WAIT!!! I am seriously SO excited. I may do a little happy dance every time I think about it. I am going to make a countdown to surgery paper chain. I am that ridiculous about it! I was TERRIFIED for surgery last time but this time, I just can't wait for it to finally be here. The surgery is nothing compared to my last one, just an hour long surgery and a 3-5 day hospital stay. I'm hoping to keep it to 3 days :) There is a 50% chance of infection which sounds REALLY high to me and has me a little worried but I'm praying that that won't happen and that everything will just go smoothly. So ready to be back to normal again! I can't even imagine how it will feel when they say I'm cancer free. The thought just fills me up. I have learned so much through this experience but it's been so hard. SO hard. Can't wait to just be myself again and not have this weight and worry that I carry with me every moment of every day. That first week in March just can't come soon enough!!