go fund me

One thing that has been fascinating to see during this scary time is how the people who love me, who love my husband and children, how they have rallied around our little family. The support and love that has surrounded us has just been incredible. It has been incredible to watch my immediate family rally around us and react in different ways to show that they are on team Ashley :)

My brother, who is way too smart for his own good ;) immediately set to work doing all sorts of research with regards to the cost of cancer treatment. He was in contact with my husband and immediately following my diagnosis wanted to set up some kind of charitable fund to help off set some of those expenses.

I was very reluctant to accept any financial help.

I am very reluctant to accept any financial help.

The thought of being a 'charity case' and people having to open their wallets to donate to us, oh gosh, it just makes me sick.

Every time my husband tried to bring it up, I just didn't want to even talk about it. I have discovered that about myself - when things get too intense or uncomfortable - I pull a Scarlett O'Hara; "I can't think about that right now. If I do, I'll go crazy. I'll think about that tomorrow. "

That is why we are at where we are. I just kept waiting for my butt issues to go away on their own, never imagining that my reluctance to face reality was literally killing me.

Anyhow, one of these times when my husband tried to broach the subject of financial donations, I said "just tell him to do whatever he wants."

I didn't realize that that meant that day he was going to put one of the nicest things ever on gofundme and that it was going live on facebook right away. I kept thinking, we'll cross that bridge when we come to it, not realizing I was already in the middle of the bridge.

So here is the honest truth, I didn't even know my brother liked me. I was pretty sure I still drove him crazy. So when I read his write up on the funding website, it brought tears to my eyes.

I might not want to be a charity case, but I am incredibly grateful to everyone who donated their hard earned money and who are willing to support me in various ways, including financially, as I kick butt cancer's butt.

If you want to read about how much my brother loves me, you can check out http://www.gofundme.com/aa1law

Thanks little brother, you are amazing.